As Mother’s Day approaches, I want to remind you that you are heard. I hear you. We, parents going through this, hear and understand you. Before this estrangement, being a mother may have been a core component of your identity. Now, with the advertising and general ramp-up to this holiday, you may be facing recurring triggers.
There is no easy, one-size-fits-all approach to coping with this. You will get through this. And with support, with adaptive, intentional approaches to persevering and (yes!) even thriving, you can get through this.
If you feel overwhelmed, here are some quick tools to try:
- “Thought stopping” is a common therapeutic intervention. Before the triggering thoughts get a chance to run rampant, you clearly, intentionally, and even out loud tell them to stop bothering you.
- Distraction. There is legitimate value in diving into a project, favorite show or movie, or going outdoors with your favorite uplifting music.
- Turn to a friend. Consider reaching out and asking a friend or family member to talk to you about anything BUT Mother’s Day triggers. Connect in peer group.
- Validate yourself. You are not broken, and being distressed by such triggers is understandable. As George Harrison said, “All things must pass.” This will as well.
